Drowning
by hetalia is LOVE
Summary: It was so hard to even breathe without Karkat. His lips on yours are a million silent "I love you"s. You were drowning in Karkat; that was the only way to describe the dizzy, falling, absolutely exhilarated feeling.


You can't help stepping forward, reaching out one hand as if to touch him. All the noise in your head fades to one thought that's pulsing in your brain, skull feeling like it's vibrating. Karkat. Karkat. Oh God, he looks so incredibly sad, no matter how much he tries to hide it. You know you can help him, but you aren't sure if you should be near him.

Fuck the rules. Your self-imposed isolation has gone on too long. Every fiber of your being longs for your matesprit. You bite your lip hard, drawing purple blood. But it doesn't help, nothing will take away the need to be with Karkat again.

You're so awful for wanting this when there's the possibility you could hurt him. You take in shallow breaths, it's so hard to even be unless you're with Karkat. The voices tear you apart and nobody except your matesprit will even look you in the eyes.

Focusing hard, you can drive them away like Karkat does for you, get rid of those dark, crooning voices. Murmurs of "Kill the mutant blood. Paint your pictures with the filth in his veins." fade away and now you're the one in control of your motherfucking think-pan. Not the subjuggulators, just Gamzee.

Feeling fully you for the first time in so long, you're running forward before you're even conscious of moving at all. Clutching him close in a tight embrace, you breathe Karkat in as though you can absorb his very essence.

He's shocked at first, you can tell, but then he makes a little whining noise you're certain he's never made in front of anyone but you. You know what he wants and what he's asking without him saying so out loud. This is a dance of a relationship that you always know the steps to.

Lifting him up off the ground, he wraps his arms around your neck; one hand tangling in your curly hair, and his legs wrap around your waist. When Karkat kisses you, there's none of his casual insults or his anger and his lips on yours are a million silent "I love you"s.

Returning the kiss, you keep one hand at the small of his back to keep him steady. Your nervousness finally dissipates at the fact that Karkat isn't scared of you in the slightest. His limbs intertwine with yours and he's practically knocking you over as he clings to you in every way he knows how.

He forces out the question "Why the fuck did you leave?" and immediately goes back to kissing you without allowing you a chance to respond. You're feeling a bit lightheaded on account of not really having been breathing and you're sure Karkat must be too.

All you can do is say "I'm sorry" once he finally takes a moment to catch his breath. And you are. You're so, so sorry because you're motherfucking in love with Karkat Vantas and it was absolute torture keeping yourself away.

His skin is burning hot and the feeling is nice after being so cold, alone in the vents. The real shock is the neediness with which he grips the fabric of your shirt and weaves his fingers in your hair, like he's scared to let go. The bones in his legs are digging into your sides and back, which might hurt a little if it wasn't Karkat. For that matter, his hips are digging into yours too, and you'd both be ridiculously embarrassed about that had this been a different occasion.

Karkat's tongue is in your mouth, all his excess angry energy being put to use in this almost-panicked kissing and clinging to you. You weren't at all used to this from him, such blatant displays of affection.

It wasn't until you heard somebody clearing their throat that the two of you reluctantly pulled apart. The hazy recollection came back to you that Karkat had been talking with Dave, Rose, and Kanaya before you approached him. It took another moment for it to click that they had witnessed all of this and that was Dave clearing his throat.

Gently letting your matesprit down to the floor, you took in the sight of smudges of your greasepaint on his face, specks of purple blood on his lips from when you had bitten your lip earlier, his vivid red blush, and his rumpled sweater.

Standing next to you, now rather awkwardly after remembering you weren't the only two in the room, Karkat murmurs, "I missed you, Gamzee."

Your three companions are gaping-apparently Karkat hadn't mentioned your quadrant change. But the shorter troll is just so cute, arm wrapped around you protectively and with your greasepaint on his face. At some point in the past minute, your hand had made its way into the back pocket of his jeans, and he had let you.

Still dizzy from the past few minutes, you knew the two of you had a lot of explaining to do. But you were drowning in Karkat; that was the only way to describe the dizzy, falling, absolutely exhilarated feeling, and his muttered "I love you" into your chest made everything else worth it.


End file.
